We Are All Broken…
The lesson comes a lot later.
I’ve yet to meet someone who isn’t.
Everyone I’ve met thus far is broken in one way or the other, including me.
They have gone through hell and back, some more, some less.
Ranging from things such as murder in the family. Being raped. Having a family member kidnapped. Going to jail. Abusing drugs or alcohol. Getting cancer or having someone close get it. Having anorexia. Being depressed. Being bankrupt and homeless. Being dumped. Being left by parents. War victims. Experiencing a car accident. And other.
Some of these people were me, my family, friends and some random strangers I’ve met over the course of the lifetime.
Tell me do they sound familiar to you?
I bet they do, and that you have some additional on your own. Some you’ve experienced, some you might be experiencing now.
And I have to be a bastard here and say, that things have to get worse before they get better.
That’s just the harsh reality of the world we live in.
There is a famous speech in by Sylvester Stallone in the movie Rocky:
“Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place, and I don’t care how tough you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard you hit; it’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward.”
I’ll let that sink in for a moment before I continue.
I would say (and you might disagree with me), that experiencing these things in life is not the hardest part.
The hardest part is not letting these things take control over our lives. Control how we make decisions, how we get into relationships. How to take the next job. And many other important things.
Of course, these things will shape you, but you have the choice to decide how.
And yes, at the moment when they are happening, you are not “all sunshine and rainbows.” You hate every minute of it.
You get angry, depressed, frustrated, spiteful. And that’s normal. That’s just human nature.
I vividly remember when my dad got cancer for the second time, and my grandfather dying from cancer couple of months after that (great family genes…).
I wasn’t thinking: “Oh boy, this is fucking exciting!”
Fuck no, I cried, I slept entire day, I tried to be strong for my family, but there were days when you are walking down the street, and the tears keep rolling down your face.
At that moment you are not thinking about the lesson you can learn from this. At that moment you are trying to survive.
In Daredevil, on of the bad guys has a quote he keeps repeating:
“Problems are just opportunities that haven’t presented themselves.” -Wilson Fisk
But the problem for most people passively waits for the opportunity to present itself.
Sure, you can do that. But you will be trapped in the negative spiral. In these moments you have to act, no matter how hard it seems. You have to find a way. Or make one.
You see this?
In this photo, there are two things you can find.
One is a profile of an old lady, and the other is a profile of a young girl.
And just like in life, you just have to find a way to shift your perception, to find that young girl.
Which in this case would represent something positive.
Sometimes you can shift your perception on your own, but sometimes you need help. And you should ask it from the people closest to you.
Even though you might think that your family and friends wouldn’t understand, or they might even be a part of the problem, I bet someone out there has gone through the same shit as you did, and they are there, alive.
They can provide valuable insight into things that you might miss.
But in the end, you have the power. You might not think you do, at least not always, but trust me, within you, there is an answer to your question.
Life is interesting.
There are good and bad things, and they are bound to happen.
Hopefully, for you and me, more good things will happen.
And for the bad, well, we can always go back to this article as a starting point.
PS: We are all broken…and that’s okay.
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Author: Zdravko Cvijetic
Zdravko Cvijetic, the founder of Zero To Skill, creates practical content, ranging from articles, e-guides, and courses, that will help you become a top performer, by gaining clarity on your life path, mastering your habits and becoming 3x more productive. With a degree in Adult Education and Lifelong Learning, he was able to create content that has influenced more than 100.000 people.